Stimming Part 2: When You Want to Rock in the Corner Too New Blog Post

Last week I shared some information about stimming, what it can look like, and a short video of Noah and his sister. She joined right in, moving with him, because sometimes the best way to connect is simply to meet someone where they are.

This week I wanted to talk about the other side of stimming. The side that caregivers often think about but rarely admit out loud.

With Noah, stimming usually looks like rocking and making noise. He has done both for as long as I can remember. The rocking has never really bothered anyone. In fact, if rocking builds core muscles, Noah deserves his own fitness commercial. The child has abs that most adults would gladly trade for.

The noise is another story.

Everything I have read says not to stop a child from stimming unless it is causing harm. I completely understand why. Stimming serves an important purpose. It can help regulate emotions, reduce anxiety, process sensory information, express excitement, or simply make the world feel more manageable.

So if Noah is not hurting himself or anyone else, why would I stop him?

Because sometimes everyone else in the house is about to lose their minds.

The sound can go on for minutes. Sometimes for hours. It is constant, repetitive, and impossible to ignore. There are days when all three of his sisters have had enough. Mom has had enough. Dad has had enough. The dog has probably had enough.

At times we can redirect him downstairs with his toys. We tell him he is welcome to come back when he is quieter. Sometimes it works.

Sometimes it does not.

Sometimes everyone is asking him to please be quiet, and Noah honestly does not understand why everyone is upset.

Then there are the moments when I think I should just join him. Find a corner, start rocking, and chant right along with him. At least then I would feel like I was contributing to the family soundtrack.

We all own noise-canceling headphones. They help...a little. But they are not exactly practical when someone is trying to have a conversation, watch television, help with homework, or simply enjoy a quiet evening.

The reality is that this is one of those parenting situations where there is no perfect answer.

The more I have learned about stimming, the more I have realized Noah is not making noise to annoy us. He is not being defiant. He is not trying to push everyone's buttons.

He is meeting a need that his brain has.

That does not magically make the constant noise easier to live with. It simply helps explain why it happens.

As parents and caregivers, we spend so much time trying to balance two important goals: respecting the needs of our children while also recognizing that everyone else in the family has needs too. Finding that balance is not always easy.

So I have a question for those of you raising children or caring for adults who stim.

What has worked for your family? Have you found ways to redirect the behavior, create quiet spaces, or help everyone meet in the middle?

I would genuinely love to hear your ideas because I have a feeling we are not the only family that occasionally considers buying industrial strength noise-canceling headphones.

If this post made you laugh, nod your head in agreement, or simply reminded you that you are not alone, please share it with someone else who may need it. Be sure to follow us on Facebook for Noah's latest adventures, everyday mischief, and plenty of laughs along the way. You can also Join the Journey on our website to receive an email whenever a new blog is published.